& my world will be coloured.

Monday, September 22, 2008

before i get excited, let me finish wad i need to update on.

so.. Day 3 without him.
Yesterday (Sunday)
i was so damned tired and all. bt still, i miss him and told mum tat i wanna make another kueh. thanks to all the hari raya songs that's playing on air. hahaha. it simply motivates me to make another one! hahaha. dad and mum busy painting the hse. so.. we're left with decorating the house with mats and carpets.. and.. the christmas lights outside our house, the corridors.. and arrange the kuehs! hahahhahahaha! yaay. i cooked for buka (break fast). cause mum and dad need to buy the dining table. haha. so bro and i cooked for buka! ((: we cook prata, sardines, fry the nuggets, the fish fingers and im about to start with the fried rice, and mum came back from ikea. hahaha. ((: at night, dad set up the dining table. ahhaha. it was tough on him. he wash both van and car, painted the house and collect the dining table and even set it up. good job dad! ((: mum is having wild ideas in her head... on how to decorate the hse. (: haha. so cute. and my bro? he's good-for-nothing. really. he simply baring (lie down) and watch tv. hahahah. hopeless creature on earth. i find him BULKY at home. ugh. hah. his PSLE is drawing nearer and i think im the one having the heart attack instead of him. yeah. so everyone slept real early that night. was toooo tired. (:

so TODAY, i met aqid awhile (: and finish up my STUPID PP. haha. hey girl, follow ur heart, kay? really. remember wad i say. i hope it helps. (: i was waiting for gerald love to msg me or something.. bt den, i got a feeling that he will come back late at night, just like the time he went china. haha.
i was busy doing my PP and then i got a few messages from shyaq and aqid. suddenly.... the hp rang. WITHHELD. i thought its my cousin or something, cause it's like.. private number? haha. i picked up the phone and for a second or two, i cant recognize the voice. i was busy reading the words on my lappy's screen. and then...
"oh my god, it's u, gerald." hahahahahaha.
my heart jump for joy, i tell u. hahahaha. ((: so sweet of him to callllll... hahaha. he told me that his ho went bonkers and he's at the airport. he told me that he went to search for a nearby phone just to call me, telling me he reached safely. hahahah. ((: im happy, and suddenly feel motivated to do PP. ahhaha. talked to him for about 5 mins. (: den he told me he gotta go and find his sister first. shall msg me when he reached home. ((: <3
15 mins later, i send Andy my PP and upload it on the portal. i hope.wish.pray that it will be accepted!!! good God, pls, help me with this. (:

and here i am. photos shall be up real sooon. (: i gotta go now, ppl (: hahahhaa! (u shud knw how happy i am. dammit.) hahahahha~! (:

Fif ♥ 11:12 PM

Saturday, September 20, 2008

some pictures to accompany with.

gerald love went to Hong Kong last thurs. oh well, i wasnt feeling that good on that day. my head was spinning like crazy and my stomach kept on churning. ugh. so before he left, he gave me a call and we talked a while. by that time he was at terminal 3 alrd. and yeah. den he told me that he will call back. but i totally forgotten about it. told u i was not being sooooooooooo myself on that day. haiss. but i managed to get him on the line. he was going in the plane when i called him. lucky he havent off his hp yet. and then... he said nth much. simply... "i'll miss you"

Day 1 without him.
Last Friday, i went to sch as per normal and class was fun. i had theatre appreciation and well, things went turned out pretty normal. yeah. i went back with syakir. he took the bus and i took the train. for the first time after sucha long time, i went back STRAIGHT home. as in.. didnt visit any shop or have some detours or something. so as soon i tapped my ezlink, i plugged in my mp3. oh wells. im bored. i managed to get a seat tho. hah. adik (younger bro) called me. and he told me that we'll be breaking fast at home as aunt went to the clinic and she's not feeling well. ok. so mum bought donuts and nasi ayam penyet back home. everyone was tired and we didnt talk much.
and one thing for sure, i miss him ALOT. i totally felt helpless.

Day 2 without him.
Saturday (today), mum decided to make kueh for hari raya. so in the end, she made choco chips, using family recipe, and i went over to aunt hse, make for her choco chips too, but my own recipe. haha. when i came back,mum make 3 types of kueh alrd. wahhhhhhhhhhh! hahaa.. so today, we decided to break fast outside, since everyone is tired doing their stuffs. we went bedok corner to eat. ok lah. we got a seat coz we went there early. den we proceed to ikea. we're purchasing this new dining table!!! YAAY. hahaha. nice, i tell u. so sweet. just for the 4 of us. oh well, it's wooden. not like ours now, glass. its nice, but... it's been like.. centuries since we bought that. hahaha! ((: so tmr mum and dad will go back to ikea not by car, but by van, to bring the set home. haha. we can purchase it just now if we want to, but since we went there by car, we dont want it to be bulky. hahha! ((:
and another thing for sure, i miss him more and more. not only felt helpless, but.. lost.

so i have no plans for tmr, but syafiq beep me just now to ask whether im free next wed. wanna break fast together with the 4e3 clique and aqidah. hahaha! of coz my ans is a yes! hahaha. and this time round, aqid could tag along tooo! yaaaaaay! ((: ahha. and by that time, gerald love will be backkkkk! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! :D so im sure he will break fast with us tooooo!

hahaha. ok then. i wanna rest. its been sucha longgg dayyyy. hahaha. i need my beauty sleep.or else, i couldnt wake up for my pre dawn meal. hah. take care then. (:

Labels: missing you., tired

Fif ♥ 11:09 PM

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

JUST TO CLEAR EVERYONE'S DOUBTS, I AM NOT QUARELLING WITH MY COUSIN, MUHAMMAD SYAKIR. (:

well, im in class right now and patrick is realy cute. hahah. he asked nice questions and the way he approach us is so damn NICE. hahaha. i dunno how to describe it. but u knw how doctors talk? hahha. like.. soft but.. can assure u that kind of thing? hahaha. damn cool lah. hahha. ((:

LEO is down and i hate it. stupid online thing. and MSN is gay today. really. nope. not e-buddy, aqidah. hahaha! ((:

okay. now it's the last team to present. get it over and done with. till then!

Fif ♥ 2:48 PM

Monday, September 15, 2008

GOOOOD MORNINGGGG WORLD.

im in class right now and audra is pregnant!!! hahaha. congrats to her! hahhaha. she's gorgeous, even though she's a bit pale. hahahahha. so today's module, visual communication is fine. hahaa. (: really. (: maybe gerald will fetch me from sch today. hahaha. (: ok then. wanna do my stuffs. (: take care all. and oh ya! this song, by jason mraz simply makes my day.!
anyway, the following paragraphs are just rants from my brain. hahahhaa. im not angry, but i think im just typing down wad's in my head! ((: hahah!

i thought i could gave in to them. but u wanna knw wad? i just realize something.
we all lead a totally different lifestyle. and i mean it, damn it.

i lead my own life. and im so happy with my loved ones around. dad, mum, bro, aqidah, gerald and my 4e3 clique. these are the people who really knew wad goes in and out of my brain, without me telling them. they provide me with things which i want and i need. i dun let words and their thinking bring me down. in fact, anyone can bring me down with their says. but wth. it's my life and im happy abt it. but if u dun, den wad could i say?
my family, all 4 of them, had been with me ALWAYS. nth could replace that. aqidah and my 4e3 clique seriously rock my world. i love them. as in.. we hang out, do awesome stuffs. not to mention gerald love. nt only he is part of my 4e3 clique, but someone more special. i dunno wad can i do without him. really. there are other kind souls outside there too. just that i dun spend as much time as i do with those above.

i can consider myself lucky. my family gave all the love i need. all the things that i own, it all comes from them. the way i dress to the things that i do, all thanks to their bringing up. they might be a bit difficult to handle sometimes, but with a silent prayer, everything seems to be fine.
aqidah and my usual 4e3 clique define friendship for me. i couldnt say more. gerald gave me a kind of love that i never felt before. wad more can i say now?

im not trying to limit my frends. but hey. seriously, i have my own lifestyle and im sooooooooo happy about it. im NOT boasting. ( but i dun think telling how much u love people considered boasting. ugh. wadeva shit. )

so to those people who need help with their life, dun come to me in anger. as much as u want help, is as much i want to help u too. but before u even flare up, just get the facts right. nope. im not referring to anyone in specific. but based on the things that i've went thru, i sincerely open up to doors of friendship (or even family-ness), but if the way u approach me is something that i feet is not right, den im so sorry. i cant do much. and also, if the problems that u are telling/giving me is based on someone else, den, im shuttin my ears. u can clear some doubts, but dun EVER, drag me in, as if that's my bloody problem. if u think u got attitude problem, fix it. i do have some problems with my attitude too. but hey. IM TRYING. but so far, to be honest, i dun think i give trouble to others. my family knws best, aqidah and gerald knws best. and these are the people, that i wish to spend my entire life with.

with that, fix urself up before u jump into stupid conclusions.

Fif ♥ 9:57 AM

Friday, September 12, 2008

now i realized what mr asmadi meant when he said. " if u wanna do something, do it once and for all, giving ur best shot."

how i wish someone could hear the things that i wana explain. it seems like there are 1001 things in my ming right now. everything seems HOPELESS.

i really miss bartley. really.

shucks. im stuck. im lost for words. ugh.

today's module is theatre appreciation. and today's problem statment is about interpreting an image and write a story. how i wish i could write MY story based on the image in MY head.

till then.

Labels: confused, miserable, vanish n all out of love.

Fif ♥ 9:51 AM

Monday, September 8, 2008

happy belated bdae, love.

Look into your heart you will find

There's nothin' there to hide

Take me as I am take my life

I would give it all I would sacrifice

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for

I can't help it there's nothin' I want more

Ya know it's true

Everything I do I do it for you

first and foremost, i would like to apologize. i've been suchan ass for not updating. hais. seriously, i was busy.

ugh. wadever. new sem started and nth change for the better. still the same.

it's now the month of ramadhan. and i got a feeling that this will be a fast one. actually, im kinda scared of the time. sometimes, it pass by too fast for me to breathe. hais. so to all muslims, jia you! u got roughly 3 more weeks to fast! hahahaha. ((:

and and and. happy belated bdae to my dearest love. (: breakfast with syafiq, shyaq, min, hafiz and him the other day. sooo sad gf cant make it due to band. hais. i totally know how she feels. hais. nvm! next time, kay?

now, let me self-complain about PP. you guys can ignore the following paragraph. PP is suchan idiot. yes. idiot. it cant let me have my beauty sleep and my mind keep thinking about it more than love. yes, oh yes. that freaking 2000 word essay. its kinda irritating when someone ask u to keep revising on it. i wish/hope/pray it wil be over soon. freak.

love wil be out for chalet a few days and i dun think i can meet him. ): well, oh well. hais. nvm! told ya life is totally being extra UNFAIR to me lately.

oh ya! have i told u that my hair is growing?! hahhaha. yayyyyyy! ((: ok. super random. hah!

i beep aqidah today, due to someone. hahahha. and in the end, we cant stop talking abt him. LOLS. ((: he, with his funny and disgusting attitude. hahahahaha!

ok. done. i've updated. (:

Labels: belated burfday, fasting month

Fif ♥ 11:47 PM